How many business cards have you collected at networking events that you’ve never done anything with?
And if we take that a step further, how many networking events have you gone to that have felt completely transactional?
You don’t learn anything new, the connections you make don’t go anywhere, and it all feels like a big old waste of your energy.
I know this might seem confusing and perhaps a little counterintuitive (especially coming from an avid networker myself). I want to challenge the traditional notion that networking events are necessary for business success.
Quality over Quantity
Traditional networking events often push quantity over quality. The pressure to collect a stack of business cards creates shallow connections. It becomes an exercise of how many people you can meet for fear of not getting to that one person who could be instrumental to your business.
Building a Strong Inner Circle
Instead, I want to focus on building a strong inner circle, a tight-knit group of 4 ideal people. This might sound small, but it’s incredibly powerful. Here’s why:
- Time Investment: A smaller network frees up time and energy for deeper connections.
- Meaningful Relationships: Focus on quality over quantity. Invest in cultivating authentic relationships with those who truly matter.
- Be Yourself: With a smaller network, you can be your true, authentic self.
The Magic Four
So, who should be in your inner circle? Here are the four key players:
- The Teacher: This person stretches your thinking and helps you build your competitive edge.
- The Promoter: Your biggest cheerleader, pushing you towards your goals and believing in you more than you believe in yourself.
- The Pit Crew: Your unwavering support system, keeping you grounded and present.
- The Butt Kicker: Holds you accountable and keeps you focused on achieving your goals.
Building Genuine Connections
Here are my top 3 tips for building a quality network:
- The “Thank You For” Approach: When reaching out to someone after an event, use the “thank you for” approach. Highlight something specific you appreciated about their work.
- Be the Little Fish: Step outside your comfort zone! Seek out opportunities where you’re the “small fish” again, surrounded by people who can push you to grow.
- Conscious Connections: Audit your network and see where the gaps are. Start connecting with people you want to be part of your life’s next chapter.
Remember, quality over quantity! A strong inner circle is the key to building a powerful network that fuels your business growth.
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Transcript
Hello.
Speaker:Welcome to another episode.
Speaker:How was your week?
Speaker:Hope you had a fabulous week.
Speaker:This week, I want to talk about
Speaker:networking and in particular, why
Speaker:networking events are a waste of time.
Speaker:Yeah, I know the queen of
Speaker:networking has said it.
Speaker:I think networking events
Speaker:are a waste of time.
Speaker:And I get that right now.
Speaker:You might be wondering how on earth am
Speaker:I meant to build my multimillion dollar
Speaker:network if I don't put myself out there?
Speaker:How on earth?
Speaker:Am I meant to do this if
Speaker:I don't meet new people?
Speaker:And if I don't attend
Speaker:these type of events?
Speaker:Janine, I get it.
Speaker:And really don't get me wrong.
Speaker:I still want you to
Speaker:put yourself out there.
Speaker:It just doesn't involve 30 second well
Speaker:rehearsed elevator pitches, and it
Speaker:does not involve plastic name tags.
Speaker:The main issue I have with
Speaker:networking events is that they
Speaker:push quantity Over quality.
Speaker:The idea is to walk away with as many
Speaker:business cards as possible, right?
Speaker:I get that.
Speaker:But how much do you
Speaker:really know about them?
Speaker:What are their interests?
Speaker:What are their hobbies?
Speaker:What, what's going on for them right now?
Speaker:Do you really know anything about
Speaker:their business ethic and whether
Speaker:that actually aligns with yours?
Speaker:Whether you'd like to actually
Speaker:work with them right now?
Speaker:Do you know?
Speaker:What help they actually need and
Speaker:what's really, really going on for
Speaker:them versus the Instagrammable facade
Speaker:that's created to share the, Hey, look
Speaker:at where I've been photo on socials.
Speaker:Now, I even remember hearing the
Speaker:most observed story while I was
Speaker:at an event where I was actually
Speaker:teaching networking at this event.
Speaker:So.
Speaker:And during this event, this woman
Speaker:approached me and after talking, she
Speaker:mentioned that to attend the session,
Speaker:her boss had said to her that to get
Speaker:the ROI on the session, she had to bring
Speaker:back 10 business cards the next day.
Speaker:It was like they were turning this
Speaker:connection event into something
Speaker:that was innately inhuman.
Speaker:Something that.
Speaker:Literally became another measurable KPI.
Speaker:And my response to her was, you know
Speaker:what, you know, those bowls over
Speaker:there, as you come through the door,
Speaker:the bowls where everyone's sticking
Speaker:that business card in to win the free
Speaker:prize draw at the end of the evening.
Speaker:I said to her, go there, put
Speaker:out the 10 business cards.
Speaker:There you go.
Speaker:the ROI has been done for your boss
Speaker:and you may even win the door prize.
Speaker:Tell you it's crazy.
Speaker:It's crazy.
Speaker:This concept of collecting the number
Speaker:of business cards and contacts that
Speaker:you can hopefully add to your LinkedIn
Speaker:profile or your chase list without
Speaker:even connecting properly with another
Speaker:person is totally absurd to me.
Speaker:Another example, I was at another
Speaker:speaking event and the MC decided
Speaker:to introduce me as the Queen
Speaker:of Networking and he went on
Speaker:to say, I know how you network.
Speaker:You've got two hands.
Speaker:You've got one hand for shaking
Speaker:and the other hand for handing
Speaker:out your business cards.
Speaker:I'm like, what?
Speaker:It's crazy.
Speaker:Now we do have to go to these events.
Speaker:I get it.
Speaker:It's all part of business building.
Speaker:It's, it's something that
Speaker:some of us have to do.
Speaker:but I want you to see them as
Speaker:that, like the majority of these
Speaker:large format networking events
Speaker:are simply a meet and greet.
Speaker:There's simply a transactional
Speaker:lead generation exercise.
Speaker:But if you're curious about
Speaker:networking in a more powerful way,
Speaker:this is why I encourage you to focus
Speaker:instead on creating a tight knit
Speaker:social circle that may not even
Speaker:have more than four people in it.
Speaker:this is how I've built my business.
Speaker:I've built my business by tapping
Speaker:into a tight, a high quality
Speaker:network that through the ripple
Speaker:effect of conversation, the
Speaker:connections actually happen.
Speaker:I very rarely go to large
Speaker:scale format events.
Speaker:So why is focusing on
Speaker:a small network great?
Speaker:One of the main advantages of
Speaker:having a small network is that it
Speaker:actually frees up more time for
Speaker:you, more time and more energy to
Speaker:invest in meaningful relationships.
Speaker:When we have a massive network
Speaker:of connections, the risk is that
Speaker:we might feel obliged to attend
Speaker:every single event, to go to every
Speaker:single meeting or social gathering
Speaker:to maintain those connections.
Speaker:Sometimes that hashtag FOMO may
Speaker:kick in the fear of missing out, but
Speaker:all of this can very quickly become
Speaker:time consuming and energy draining.
Speaker:Something that you might've heard
Speaker:me speak about before on this
Speaker:podcast, where I talk about stretch
Speaker:fatigue, that feeling of being
Speaker:pulled in multiple directions.
Speaker:The opposite though, of having a small
Speaker:network of people that we can actually
Speaker:focus on, where we can build deeper,
Speaker:more authentic relationships with those
Speaker:people that truly matter the most.
Speaker:That's where the opportunity exists.
Speaker:I say embrace the hashtag JOMA
Speaker:or the joy of missing out.
Speaker:On large scale format events, and
Speaker:instead build a tight network of
Speaker:small quality group of people.
Speaker:The other opportunity of this is
Speaker:that we can be really intentional.
Speaker:Building a small network
Speaker:enables us to be much more
Speaker:intentional in our relationships.
Speaker:When we have a vast network of
Speaker:connections, it can be a challenge
Speaker:to maintain meaningful connections
Speaker:with every single person.
Speaker:However, when we focus on
Speaker:building a small but powerful
Speaker:circle, we can invest more time.
Speaker:We can invest more energy into
Speaker:cultivating those relationships
Speaker:and as a result, create a more
Speaker:significant impact with the world.
Speaker:And finally, having a small
Speaker:network helps us to become more
Speaker:authentic and true to ourselves.
Speaker:When we've got a massive network of
Speaker:connections, we might feel the need
Speaker:to present ourselves in a certain
Speaker:way to fit in or to be accepted.
Speaker:However, when we build this
Speaker:small network, a powerful inner
Speaker:circle, we can be more authentic.
Speaker:We can be true to ourselves.
Speaker:But when you have a large network,
Speaker:you've got to, work harder at this.
Speaker:So here are my three quick tips.
Speaker:For consciously connecting so that
Speaker:you can build a network that is
Speaker:based on quality and not quantity.
Speaker:Number one, It starts with four people.
Speaker:You've heard me speak about this
Speaker:before and I'm reiterating it.
Speaker:It's something I reiterate time
Speaker:and time again, your quality
Speaker:network starts with four people.
Speaker:To create a network that is
Speaker:really going to help you grow.
Speaker:You need at least four
Speaker:people, not family.
Speaker:No significant other, but people that
Speaker:fill one of these four roles, four
Speaker:independent people, you need a teacher,
Speaker:that person who is stretching your
Speaker:thinking so you know more and that you
Speaker:can build your competitive advantage.
Speaker:You need the promoter, the person
Speaker:who encourages you to do more and
Speaker:pushes you towards your goals.
Speaker:They believe in you.
Speaker:They see more in you.
Speaker:Then you see in yourself, you need
Speaker:the pit crew, the person who is
Speaker:going to be there through thick and
Speaker:thin, who keeps you grounded and
Speaker:keeps you present in the moment.
Speaker:And you need the butt kicker, the
Speaker:person that's going to hold you
Speaker:accountable and keep you focused.
Speaker:The person that's going to make sure
Speaker:that you're doing the very thing,
Speaker:the right things that you need to do
Speaker:today to move forward into tomorrow.
Speaker:And if you don't have these four
Speaker:people in your network, that's
Speaker:exactly where you need to start.
Speaker:The second tip is with this
Speaker:smaller type network, embrace
Speaker:the "thank you for" concept.
Speaker:If you want to reach out to someone after
Speaker:being at an event or after reading a book
Speaker:or consuming a piece of content about
Speaker:them on social media, then send them
Speaker:the words, thank you for, and insert the
Speaker:very thing that you're thanking them for.
Speaker:These words, thank you
Speaker:for, are a game changer.
Speaker:Think about.
Speaker:Why you admire that person.
Speaker:Think about what impact they had on you.
Speaker:Think about what they shared that you
Speaker:loved or that resonated and share that
Speaker:with them in the form of a message.
Speaker:Thank you for, and I can guarantee that
Speaker:this genuine connection is going to make
Speaker:way more impact than a normal slew of
Speaker:messages that might land in their inbox.
Speaker:And the final thing is look
Speaker:for opportunities to Be the
Speaker:little fish in the big pond.
Speaker:So many times I see people hanging out
Speaker:with the same people all of the time.
Speaker:It's almost like they
Speaker:outstay their welcome.
Speaker:They get to this point where
Speaker:they're not learning anything new.
Speaker:There's a little bit of
Speaker:group think that kicks in.
Speaker:And essentially we're all keeping
Speaker:each other at that same level.
Speaker:That's not a space for growth, just
Speaker:like jobs and homes and clothes.
Speaker:Eventually we can outgrow our network.
Speaker:And while that might leave many of us.
Speaker:If you're feeling lost, it actually
Speaker:does provide the opportunity for us
Speaker:to reach out, to be brave, to put
Speaker:yourself in a place where you're the
Speaker:small fish again in a bigger sea.
Speaker:And whether you take this as an
Speaker:opportunity to invest in group
Speaker:mentorship or simply start showing
Speaker:up in places where you would
Speaker:like to be more often, look for
Speaker:those opportunities to be pushed.
Speaker:The people that you meet in that room
Speaker:are very likely to be the key players
Speaker:in the next Stage of your growth.
Speaker:So rest assured that keeping a
Speaker:close knit circle isn't hindering
Speaker:your business growth at all.
Speaker:It isn't stopping your
Speaker:opportunities at all.
Speaker:It's time to take an audit of
Speaker:your network, of your time and
Speaker:energy that you're putting in.
Speaker:See where the gaps are for connection
Speaker:and start consciously connecting
Speaker:with the people that you want In your
Speaker:life and to be part of your life as
Speaker:this next growth in your business.
Speaker:I'd love to hear what you found
Speaker:most useful in today's podcast.
Speaker:Share below, share this
Speaker:podcast with anyone that you
Speaker:think would find it useful.
Speaker:Love you to leave a review, send
Speaker:me any questions and have a truly
Speaker:awesome week until next week.