As we approach the end of the year there is a trap that I watch many business owners fall into.
They have this habit that sticks with them from their professional through to their personal life and not only does it ruin their time at work but it can ruin their personal time too.
Do you know what it might be?
It consists of three letters.
Y.
E.
S.
It’s the habit of saying yes to everything. Trying to be the fixer of all problems, and the person that everyone can rely on.
And while this sounds like a great thing, it comes at the detriment of their own health and wellbeing.
What this looks like across these next few weeks in the run up to the holidays is saying yes to every event, every errand, every meet-up. Which internally feels like stress, lack of sleep, and not getting the well deserved rest you need.
Now you might be thinking that it’s too early to start thinking about the holidays. But they are only 6 weeks away. And right now I want you to look at your calendar and start counting how many days of actual rest you will be able to achieve with your current holiday plans?
If there is only one or two days of rest available? I would hazard a guess that your working week’s aren’t much different.
Meetings and client deadlines looming every day, and a whole lot of stress and tension brewing.
However, this problem can be overcome with one simple English lesson. Today we are going to practice together. We are going to practice how to say this word…
NO.
Two letters, but not so easy to pronounce for a lot of people.
So let’s debunk a few pronunciation myths that pop up when it comes to saying the word no.
Saying no makes it seem like I can’t handle it – Knowing your limits and managing your time effectively is a skill of great leadership. Not only team leadership, but self-leadership. If one of your goals is to become a better leader than practising saying no should be part of your weekly routine.
Saying no means I’m missing out – While the FOMO is definitely real in the world I want you to think about instead, “what is every YES costing me?”. When we say yes to things that drain our energy, take our focus away from our goals, or don’t serve us, then what we are really doing is self-sabotaging. Saying yes is often an excuse we give ourselves so we don’t have to be held accountable to our goals. If you want to achieve more, then you need to practice saying no.
And finally, people will hate me if I say no. The people who will be most upset by you installing boundaries are the people who were benefiting from you not having any. Read that once more. These types of people fit within my shadow archetypes (check out my book It’s Who You Know for more on this), the people that suck your energy, bring you down, and try to stop you from succeeding. I’ll go more into this next week, but if you get backlash for saying no for your own health and wellbeing then you might need to reconsider the relationship you have with that person and the role they play in your network.
What did you think of today’s English lesson? What are you going to say NO to this week?
Janine x
