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Desperation does you no favoursYou’ve worked hard on your positioning. You’ve worked hard to establish who your dream clients are and have practised over and over in front of the mirror saying no to opportunities that don’t fit, saying the price you want to charge… 

So why do we find ourselves falling back into old habits, begging for work and under charging our worth? 

It’s that frantic push to close deals, lock in sales, and secure that bottom line. But here’s the truth bomb: desperation doesn’t work. In fact, it often leads us down a path we’re better off avoiding – a race to the bottom.

I’ve seen this scenario unfold time and again, like a broken record stuck on the same tune. And believe me, I’ve been there too. That moment when it feels like the walls are closing in and you’re tempted to grasp at any deal that comes your way. But here’s what I’ve come to understand: looking desperate isn’t the key to unlocking success. It’s quite the opposite.

The truth is, when desperation takes over, we end up undervaluing ourselves, our services, and the worth we bring to the table. It’s like giving away your masterpiece for pennies, all because you’re scared the canvas won’t sell.

Let me share a story that perfectly encapsulates this journey from desperation to empowerment. 

A client of mine, organised a free event, pouring her heart into the preparation. 60 people turned up. The event was a success but desperation started knocking the next day. The question that haunted her was, “How do I turn these attendees into sales?”

The advice I gave her wasn’t about chasing those conversions. 

It was about shifting the perspective from desperation to being of service. And that’s when the magic happened. 

Instead of scrambling for that sale, she started embracing her role as a valuable resource. 

She got curious – how could she genuinely help those 60 attendees? And guess what? Her diary of client commitments filled up for the rest of the year, and this meant that her diary for 2024 is already filling up!

When you approach from a standpoint of genuine service, doors open and connections deepen.

So what can you focus on to use connection to create magic in your business and life?

1. Ask more questions. 

Instead of jumping straight into problem-solving mode, which can be easy to do, ask questions to discover the root of the problem that this person is facing. What help do they really need right now? What is the biggest challenge that they are facing? You may discover that the problem that they thought they had is not the most pressing issue right now. These questions alone might give them the clarity they need to start taking action, and even if they don’t begin working with you immediately I can guarantee that they are never going to forget the person that helped them find direction when they were feeling lost. That’s a powerful connection.

2. Give unconditionally. 

In the world of business, a lot of us may have been conditioned to believe that our acts of kindness and our choice to give to others will end up with us being trampled on. But this cut-throat environment doesn’t have to be the way we do business. You can choose to be the person who stops the cycle, who is so comfortable in the value that you offer that you know you can give freely to create an impact for others. When we give, we open the door for connection. We let others see our value, and the impact that we make increases tenfold. But giving unconditionally does not mean accepting everyone who needs your help as a client, I’ll explain below…

3. Commit to working with your A-grade clients, instead of everyone. 

Without this commitment, we end up saying yes to projects and work that don’t suit us and also don’t benefit the client. Our best clients are the perfect intersection of the people who we love working for, with the people who benefit the most from our services, overlaid with a mutual respect of value, and being paid our worth. By getting laser-focused on who this is you open yourself to connect with these people and create connections that benefit everyone. When you understand this you also understand when to walk away, because you know who you don’t serve or who won’t benefit the most from your services. This doesn’t mean you ghost them, but rather, point them in the right direction and then set them free on their journey so that you can walk away knowing that you still led with a value-first approach. 

Here’s what you need to remember: Don’t look desperate! Instead, embody service. Embrace your strengths. Value yourself enough to walk away from ill-fitting opportunities.

Success isn’t a destination – it’s a way of life. An empowering mindset, combined with service and self-worth, has the power to elevate us beyond desperation’s grasp. It’s a path that sparks inspiration and ignites change.

So are you going to start this year desperate or are you going to start looking at client acquisition a little differently? 

Janine x

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